by Robin Roenker
If you're a stay-at-home parent of a toddler or preschooler, you know that as fun as Play-Doh and Candy Land can be, sometimes you need a little adult conversation.
That's where playdates come in. Done right, they can be as much fun for the parents as for the kids themselves. Kids love the chance to travel to a new place and explore someone else's toys, and parents can recharge for an hour or so over mini-muffins and coffee. Before you invite young children over to play, though, there are a few simple steps you can take to make sure you're ready.
Straighten only the rooms you'll use for the playdate. Don't obsess about cleaning every square inch of your house. Most families have a home that looks "lived in," and parents won't judge you if yours falls into this category. Instead, give the kitchen, guest bathroom , and family room or play room where the kids will be gathered a thorough tidying. Close doors to other rooms or use baby gates to keep kids corralled where you want them.
Child proof rooms kids will use. If you're hosting very young toddlers — ones who still put everything in their mouths — put away any small toys that could be a choking hazard. Make sure all electrical outlets are covered and all sharp toys are out of young kids' reach. Tie up blind cords and electrical cords so kids aren't tempted to pull on them. If you have breakable knick-knacks on tables or shelves, or other valuables kids can reach, move them out of the child-proofed room for the day.
Talk to your child about sharing. For some kids, sharing seems to come naturally. For others, it's a real struggle. Encourage your child by discussing sharing a few days before the playdate. (Explain that the other kids will just be borrowing the toys while they're at your house, and that they won't be taking them away.) Talk about how fun it will be to have friends over who can help build blocks or play dress up. If your child has one or two toys that are particularly special to her (perhaps they're brand new or gifts from a special relative), it's okay to designate these as "off limits" for the playdate. Put them away before the playdate begins, out of the other kids' sight. This will help ease any concerns about favorite toys being broken.
Group toys, books and games by category. Spend a little time before the playdate organizing your toys so kids can find what they want to play with more easily. Use bins or cubbies to group all the dress-up outfits together and all the pretend kitchen foods together, for example. Have other bins for books, board games and blocks. It'll be easy to pull out toys and suggest activities for the kids, since you'll know right where everything is.
If you're hosting preschoolers, plan one activity. Three- and four-year-olds love arts and crafts. Pre-planning a simple craft activity (it could be as easy as making puppets out of brown paper lunch sacks, some crayons and construction paper) can help keep the good vibe of the playdate going — and it gives you an alternative if the free play starts to get a bit too chaotic. Whatever craft you choose, make sure you have enough materials on hand for all the kids, and plan for a few do-overs, since kids often make mistakes. Organized games like Twister or hide-and-seek also can help focus kids' energies and diffuse any conflict that might be brewing over taking turns or sharing.
Prepare a snack and a space to serve it in. No playdate is complete without snack time . Have some milk or juice boxes and a healthy (but easy to serve) snack of fruit, or cheese and crackers. For the parents, prepare some coffee or hot tea and some mini-muffins or bagels with cream cheese, or anything else that's easy to eat one-handed, while everyone helps watch kids. Before everyone arrives, prepare a space to serve the snacks, perhaps simply the kitchen table or island for the grown- ups, and a small, kid-sized folding table for the children, preferably away from carpet to avoid juice stains. Set out napkins, plates and cups before the playdate begins — it'll be one less thing you have to worry about once your pint-sized guests start shouting, "I'm hungry!"
Set up a space for parents. Parents will want to mingle and relax while watching the kids play. Allow parents to chit-chat on the couch if it's in eyesight of the play room, or bring in some folding chairs near the kids' play space so you can enjoy the luxury of a little adult company while still keeping an eye on the children.
Finally, don't stress! Playdates are supposed to be fun, not a chore to host. If you adopt a carefree, excited attitude about the event, your guests — both the children and their parents — will sense it and everyone will have a great time.
Freelance writer Robin Roenker, a mother of three young boys, has hosted plenty of playdates!
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